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Anti-Aging-News |
HUMOURLaugh your way to health Laughing is one of the least expensive and best methods of increasing the quality and quantity of your life! Plus it is fun.We will be featuring options in every issue including the odd bit of humour. The key is to allow yourself to really "Laugh Out Loud" when you see or hear something funny. It sets up a chain reaction to your cells and they immediately start vibrating on a higher frequency that triggers your glands to automatically release endorphins and you feel good. Here then is a funny definition of Success : ) SUCCESS: At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants. At age 12 success is . . . ....having friends. At age 16 success is . . . .......having a drivers license. At age 20 success is . . ...........having sex. At age 35 success is . . ...............having money. At age 50 success is . . . .............having money. At age 60 success is . . . ..........having sex. At age 70 success is . . . .......having a drivers license. At age 75 success is . . ......having friends. At age 80 success is . . not peeing in your pants.
Humorous Quotes
Laughter Therapy a free cure to aging Laughter has been found to lower blood pressure, reduce stress and increase muscle flexion. Laughter boosts immune function by raising levels of infection-fighting T-cells, disease-fighting proteins called Gamma-interferon and B-cells, which produce disease-destroying antibodies. Laughter also triggers the release of endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, and produces a general sense of well-being. Laughter is infectious. Hospitals around the country are incorporating formal and informal laughter therapy programs into their therapeutic regimens. In countries such as India, laughing clubs -- in which participants gather in the early morning for the sole purpose of laughing -- are becoming as popular as Rotary Clubs in the United States. Humor is a universal language. It's a contagious emotion and a natural diversion. It brings other people in and breaks down barriers. Best of all it is free and has no known side reactions. Give yourself a daily dose of laughter by sharing jokes with friends or coworkers, watching funny videos, or reading humorous cartoons or satire. And when a stressful situation arises, try to respond with a sense of humor, rather than with hostility or anger. It has been established beyond doubt that laughing has a positive impact on the various systems of the body...and its free! Hence it is said that ‘Prevention is better than a Cure" It is said that "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy".
What You Eat... For those of you who watch what you eat... Here's the final word on nutrition and health, and it's a relief to know the truth after all those Speaking English is apparently what kills you
Defining Old "OLD"
The panhandler n unkept looking panhandler, who obviously has seen more than his share of hard times approaches a well dressed gentleman on the street. "Hey, buddy, can you spare two dollars?" The well-dressed gentleman responds: "You are not going to spend it on liquor are you?" "No, sir, I don't drink," retorts the panhandler. "You are not going to throw it away in some card game, are you?" asks the gentleman. "No way, I don't gamble," answers the panhandler. "You wouldn't waste the money at a golf course for greens fees, would you?" asks the man "Never," says the panhandler, "I don't play golf." "You wouldn't waste the money for fishing gear, flies, boots or Never," says the panhandler, "I don't fish." The man asks the panhandler if he would like to come home with him for a home cooked meal.The panhandler accepts eagerly. While they are heading for the man's house, the panhandler's curiosity gets the better of him."Isn't your wife going to be angry when she sees a guy like me at your table?" "Probably," says the man, "but it will be worth it. I want her to see what happens to a guy who doesn't drink, fish, gamble or play golf."
Short Snippets "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." * Paul Rodriguez "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." * Drew Carey
Things That Are Difficult To Say When You've Had Too Much To Drink
HUMOROUS QUOTES
LaughCast I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well for my age". A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked,"Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer/wine?" "Oh no," I replied. "I've never done either." Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?" I said "No, I've heard that all red meat is very unhealthy!" "Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing "No, I don't," I said. He said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or sexually fool around?" "No," I said. "I've never done any of those things." He looked at me and said, "Then why the H do you care if you live to be 80?"
Have a break and listen to the The Laughing Song Will take a minute to load
LaughCast The Four Stages of Life - Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. - When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there. -You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster. - It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. - Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. - Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
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